Boy Rene's Musings

Leather 101: Tips for fun, safe play.

by boy rene

I've been meeting several men who are just recently entering into kink and Leather play with their loved ones. However, after talking with some of them, I've realised that they don't necessarily know what they should, in order to have a fun and safe experience for all those involved. That's why I've decided to give some safety tips on the more common types of play.

Drugs and Alcohol. Although it may sound like a fun idea to smoke up or get a bit tipsy before a scene, so you can enjoy it better, my suggestion is a heart-felt: don't. If you're flirting with some hot leather-clad guy in a bar, and he decides to get shit-faced or high as a kite before the scene, don't go any further with him. The simple fact is, almost any form of play requires a certain sense of awareness and skill. The moment the top decides to start playing with chemicals before, or during, a scene, that skill and awareness level go down. It's an easy way to get hurt, and not dipping into drugs and alcohol are a great way to ensure a safe and fun experience for both of you. Besides, take it from me: A great play scene can reproduce any effect that a drug could give you anyway.

Bondage. Some guys get a really big thrill at being restrained or getting tied up, and believe me, I'm right there with them. There are a few things you want to keep in mind, though, to make it fun for everyone. If the guy you're going to be playing with comes at you with zip ties to tie you down, stop everything right then and there. They are *not* a safe form of bondage toy. The only way to remove them, once they've been tied is to cut them. It's extremely easy to tie them too tightly, to the point where getting underneath it to cut it with a knife or scissors is impossible. If you're going to try bondage, all you need is some light sheets, or leather restraints that are specifically made for it. Also, I would strongly suggest avoiding direct-skin contact with duct tape. If left on too long, it can tear and scar the skin.

Wax and Ice. One of the things that many people try when they're new, is temperature play, like wax or ice. Both are fairly easy, and require a relatively low amount of skill to have a lot of fun with it. That doesn't mean that it doesn't require a small amount of know-how. For wax, know the kind of wax you need. Make sure you use 100% paraphin wax. Beeswax has a mugh higher melting point, and will give a much higher chance of really burning the person you're playing with. Until you know what you're doing, it's also suggested that you stay away from coloured or scented wax. Anything added to the wax, like oils, scents, or dyes, will raise the melting point. A rule of thumb is typically, the darker the colour, the higher the melting point, but I've seen some yellow candles burn hotter thens ome black ones. A good idea would be testing the candles on your forearm before using them on someone else. For ice cubes, simply be aware of any sharp edges the ones you're using might have, and be sure to not leave the ice on long enough to cause for frostbite to set in, and you should be fine.

These are the three types of play I've found most common with people who are just starting out. Just remember: the important thing is for everyone to have fun. If it wasn't, then it wouldn't be called play, now would it?